Feeling the Need to Vent

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  • #44882
    lorilori
    Participant

    Hi all! I am really feeling the need to vent. Stress levels these days are running really high. I really thought that the MCAT, application procedure, interviews and waiting for an acceptance letter was as bad as it gets. Boy was I wrong! As each day passes, and the “unknown frontier” of moving and starting medical school comes closer, fear becomes more and more of a reality. Why couldn’t there be a medical school in my back yard? Although we are only moving two hours away, I worry about my son’s transition. I worry about my husband finding a job. I worry about how we are going to survive on one income. I worry about where we are going to live. I worry about balancing med school and family. If I had family closer to where we were going, I am sure I would feel more at ease. My son has been used to being surrounded by family. How is he going to handle the fact that it is only going to be mommy, daddy, and him? Am I still going to be able to be the “mommy” he is used to? Am I going to be able to handle the the curriculum? When am I going to study? I hear horror stories about anatomy. Am I going to be able to memorize all of the nerves, muscles etc? I have the “basic minimum” of bio and chem courses. I know I need to breathe, but sometimes as I sit alone, these and many other thoughts go through my head. I am wlrking over 40 plus a week so that we are able to put some money away for the move. I took midnight shifts so that I am still able to spend as much time as possible with my family (but I find myself tired all the time!) I guess I will just take it one day at a time. Sorry for the “downer post”, but I really needed to vent.

    #44883
    LindseyLindsey
    Participant

    I HEAR YOU LORI!!!! It’s a huge transition you’re making, and despite the enthusiam with which you’ve anticipated medical school, the bottom line is that the road ahead is not an easy one.

    I think a lot of us older moms (who have had stability in a previous career, stability at home before medical school and all) find the transition to be especially daunting, because it throws everything into a sort of nebulous zone. A new equilibrium has be be reached.

    The first year of medical school was really tough for me….both because of the academic work was hard and because the routine was all screwed up. I found it absolutely imperative….both for my own sanity and the health of my family relationships…to find ways to manage the stress. I think the thing that helped me most was my belief (and constantly reminding myself) that everything would work out just fine if I did what I believed was right….and that has usually meant learning the material well (but maybe not as well as I could have) while putting my family first. My relationship with my husband has improved in medical school, and I think it has a lot to do with the fact that I let him know that my family still comes first….

    This second year has been a breeze after the huge hump of last year. Keep breathing and keep doing the next best thing…. And the BEST OF LUCK to you!!!!!

    Peace~
    Lindsey

    #44884
    rockfeverrockfever
    Participant

    I know that it’s hard but at least you’re in. think of this, in additon ot the things you mentioned besides moving, i have the anxiety of STILL waiting to hear from med schools. I know that things dont’ look so good at this point so then there’s also the anxiety of what i am going to do if i dont’ get in. so be excited and happy that you are fulfilling your dream! some of us may never get there!

    Vanessa

    #44885
    lorilori
    Participant

    Thanks Lindsey for your words of encouragement. I really needed that. I know everyone has their own problems, and mine may seem trivial, but I really needed to vent :boggled: . The road ahead is a difficult one, this I know. I keep trying to remember the end result of fulfilling my dream of becoming a doctor. I know the first year is probably going to be one of the hardest (transition wise) as it was when I returned for my post-bacc pre-reqs. It took a lot to get into the “swing of things”. I am glad to know there are others who have been there and MOST IMPORTANTLY, survived! Once again, thanks! 🙂

    Vanessa, I feel your pain, I really do. I didn’t think med school was going to happen for me either. I even went as far as finishing up all of the necessary courses to pursue the 600 clinical hours for PA. This was one of the alternatives I was considering. I also was determined that if I didn’t get in the first time around, I would reapply one more time. Only God knows when the “right time” is. I knew in my heart, that if this was the right time, God would get me there. I did all I could, and left the rest to him. Please don’t get too discouraged, anything can happen. What schools did you apply to? Did you broaden your options by applying both allopathic and osteopathic? I will say a few prayers for you. My fingers are crossed :crossfingers: Good luck!

    #44886
    efex101efex101
    Participant

    If the school is only two hours away why are you moving? Is there any way that you could possibly commute every other day or even daily? I would be hard pressed to move my family with all their support network if the school was that close. The closest school for me will be about one hour away but with traffic it will probably end up being a two hour commute to and from. Have you considered this option?

    #44887
    lorilori
    Participant

    If the school is only two hours away why are you moving? Is there any way you could possibly commute every other day or even daily?

    That’s a good question, but a hard one. With traffic and rush hour, you would probably be talking 2.5 to 3 hours each way daily? That would be a total of 5 to 6 hours of commuting a day. Don’t you think that would be too much? Actually, I thought that 6 hours could be put to better use (such as studying, spending with family, etc.) I explained to my son that I would be willing to take him by here on weekends or during vacations anytimes he wants to come in and visit. I also thought summers are long, and he would be able to spend an enormous amount of time with his family then as well. My husband is actually really excited about the move, although there are no definitve decisions on where he will find work.

    Any other commuters out there that make this kind of trip on a daily basis? I actually think I am going to post that in the General Discussion area. Maybe there will be more takers to help answer that.

    #44888
    efex101efex101
    Participant

    Yeah, three hours would be quite a bit. Have you actually drove there during the times that you would be going? what I would do, is leave your house at the time you think you should to get there in the morning and then drive back at some set time and see how the traffic is. I am sure that you probably have already tried this but if not, it may be a good way to see how much time it actually takes to include traffic. But, if your husband is excited about the move, I am sure that your son will adapt really well, kids are so resilient and open to new things (most of the time). The only thing would be support from family and friends, but because you are not too far away I am sure that if the need arised you would have plenty of folks to depend on. Keep us posted!

    #44889
    SuzzyQSuzzyQ
    Participant

    Hey Lori. I think you are the first person to put all of my thoughts in writing. I dont think you should commute. Those 2 hours will seem like forever during your 3rd and 4th years but they will be nothing on the weekends when you are taking your son back to visit the family. He WILL adjust, thats one of the great things about kids. Dont stress over that. 😎

    I am moving 7 hours away but i guess that moving is moving. My problems are a bit different yet the same. I graduated in December but haven’t been able to find a job since then. My husband is still in school so the only income we have right now is his school financial aid. We are trying to hurry and put our house on the market so that we can get what ever profit that we make off of it to help us move and get by until checkes are cut for the fall. I had really expected to have a decent job after graduation so that we could stay here as long as possible and keep an income. Now, how do I find a job that will only hire me for a few months? If I dont tell them that I am leaving, then I’m going to feel guilty about leaving after they go through all the effort of training me.

    Then there is the issue of selling the house. We have a very large backyard and I am worried about moving the guys and the dog into an apartment with no yard. My oldest said that it would be ok as long as there is a pool but I still feel guilty because I never finished the tree house that I promised him.

    Im not worried about my husband. He is very excited because this was where he wanted me to go. There is a PA program there that he really wnats to get into and he will be able to finish his BA there in 2 semsesters.

    Most of the time I am not worried about classes. I know how I study and am sure that I will be fine. Some times though, I do get panic attackes when i think about the about of information that we are going to have to absorb.

    Now that we are in, I dont want to have to do anything for a few months but it seems that I am going to be busier than ever, and i dont like that!! 🙂

    I am going to send you a PM Lori with my MSN email. Add me if you have MSN Messanger and then we can really vent!!!!! 😀

    Emily

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