August 30, 2003 at 7:11 pm #25882MomMDParticipant
I was inspired by another post where someone mentioned flirting between male docs and younger RNs. Another who said they don’t mind being paged by the cute male RN. One thing I found to be interesting at our local hospital was the amount of flirting that went on. I wasn’t shocked, just amused. I witnessed some shameless flirting between staff. Is this true of everywhere? How does it make you feel? Have you been flirted with? Does the pressure of working in stressful situations lead to stress release via sexual tension??!! What else is it? Go on, share your stories!! :blush: 😮 😉 😀
P.S. Thought that title would grab your attention!!August 31, 2003 at 6:44 am #25883MelissaGrayParticipant
I have found that there is a lot of flirting, innuendo, and sexual tension in med school. I just figured it had to do with all of the time we spend together & the fact that we end up studying and discussing such intimate things.August 31, 2003 at 3:23 pm #25884RitaParticipant
Hmm :twocents: worth is: First, if you do flirt, work out the boundaries first from conversational cues and set your own. Secondly, if in doubt DON’T, you may
a)Hurt someone’s feelings
b)Get hauled over the coals or worse,
C)Be put on Gerry Springer!
Cheers.September 1, 2003 at 3:50 pm #25885MD97IBCLC2B2010Participant
YES! In med school I heard (it didn’t really happen to me- oh no I take that back- IT DID!) that students and residents (maybe even attendings) even dated and that the younger or lower hierarchal female was taken advantage of- orthopedic and ER docs were supposedly the worse. I had a friend who was in the OR as a student and the surg resident or attending asked her if she had any Indian in her (she’s white Irish) she said “no” he said “you want some?” BTW that girl was a little loose herself and wound up getting pregnant in her 4th yr from a 1 night stand (not an MD) and since she’s Catholic- she kept the baby but had to rearrange her whole life- she was very smart and she’s probably a great doc now. When I was a first yr we got to spend some time in the ER and this intern befriended me, but we had some weird kind of pseudosexual relationship (where we like dated but never did anything) because his “fiance” was in another med school far away! well that was painful and I had to end it. Then I became puritanically religious, so it wasn’t much of any issue anymore, but I really started to notice everyone flirting around me! I would say that alhough there are some “couples” with in the same level it was mostly just good friendships- all along my training, we (males and females) slept next to eachother on call with nothing happening. But male students with nurses and male attendings with nurses and male attendings with female students or residents is just the worst! If its to my advantage and in a “light” manner, I will play off of it, but generally, its anoying to see the nurses blush and gush over the males and then hiss and pis :twocents:September 1, 2003 at 9:41 pm #25886maggie52Participant
Flirting is everywhere but it would be our job to cut it off at the pass- don’t ask me how I did it but when the flriting started I’d say something sarcastic or something to embarrass them in front of everybody and it stopped…
Releasing tension? I don’t any of us need THAT kind of release- there has got to be a better way-even telling a joke would be better tahn setting yourself up for pregnanacy, harrassment, rape, whatever…document all that is said to you/done to you by the higher ups if you see a problem coming up ( like they flunk you bc you wouldn’t flirt back , almost happened to me twice, once in highschool, once in an OB rotation.)September 2, 2003 at 2:49 am #25887amykParticipant
Oh, I don’t know…if the power balance isn’t way off, and there’s either mutual interest or a good sassy friendship already there, it’s not something I mind. Maybe it’s because I had plenty of practice with flirty higher-ups early on (what is it about married profs & bosses? gah), but it’s never been a problem for me, nipping those things in the bud. A simple “I’m flattered, but not interested, thanks,” always worked fine (though I actually told my flight instructor “I think you’re too old for me” :footinmouth: — I was 18 and he was 30, iirc). But then I’ve never been trapped working for a real gropester asshole.
I think sometimes cultural differences have to be taken into account, too. One foreign-nat’l prof who was pretty aggressive was v. courteous when I told him thanks, but no, and added that he’d want to watch that kind of “I have you in my sights” advance for the sake of his own career & visa. University didn’t look kindly on those relationships, and local standards were less, oh, cosmopolitan than he was used to re: romantic affairs. He was surprised, hadn’t taken the “romance is out of bounds” policies seriously, hadn’t realized others did. Nice fellow. We still have a friendly relationship.
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