Interview question: fair game or sexist/ momist?

Home Forums Debates, Issues & Talk Interview question: fair game or sexist/ momist?

Viewing 7 posts - 46 through 52 (of 52 total)
  • Author
    Posts
  • #140534
    Doc201XDoc201X
    Participant

    [quote=asunshine]Why have we confined ourselves into thinking that we can only exist as either workers or parents? [/quote]

    I don’t think this is an issue of confining ourselves as much as it is a fact that there are real limitations as to how many things one human being can do well at the same time.

    For example, I’m quite certain that neither of the Dunger parents are “good” parents because having 20 kids is just too much for two parents to handle. In fact, I think it’s highly irresponsible to have that many kids.

    And as politically incorrect as it is to say, you can be a career woman AND be an irresponsible parent if you stretch yourself too thin.

    #140536
    megboomegboo
    Participant

    I believe the family’s name is “Duggar”.

    And since none of them leech off public assistance, nor have a revolving DCFS case, the fact that they have 19 kids is none of my business. Their kids are educated, polite, and apparently well-adjusted since one is now married with kids of their own and owns his own business.

    Considering there are people in this world who can’t take care of even just one kid, I’m not sure how any of us have the right to say the Duggars are “irresponsible” parents given their success and testimony from the kids themselves that they are happy in their family and family roles (even off camera). Even before the television show they were self-sufficient.

    Maybe in general people with large families that can’t support them are irresponsible, but it’s foolish to say that one family is judged as irresponsible because their lifestyle differs from others.

    There are limitations working women face, but you can also be a career woman and be responsible in the face of being stretched too thin by asking for help, thinking outside the box, etc. There have been times all of us mothers have been stretched thin. For some of us more often than not these days. Judging different lifestyles isn’t the way to go. Outcomes are a better indicator of irresponsibility.

    #140554
    asunshineasunshine
    Participant

    .

    #140555
    asunshineasunshine
    Participant

    So why are we perseverating on the exception that proves the rule? Most moms don’t suck, whether they have jobs or not.

    #140580
    G3PGY4G3PGY4
    Participant

    Hey guys! Norovirus came and took over my household for a good week. Avoid it if you can, it is. not. pretty. lol. Anyway, glad to see this discussion is ongoing! I remember seeing some really great points. Will try to catch up and join back in. Hope everyone had a lovely Valentine’s day!

    #140581
    G3PGY4G3PGY4
    Participant

    [quote=Path201x][quote=asunshine]Why have we confined ourselves into thinking that we can only exist as either workers or parents? [/quote]

    I don’t think this is an issue of confining ourselves as much as it is a fact that there are real limitations as to how many things one human being can do well at the same time.
    [/quote]

    I think this is the heart of the issue. All of us [the venn diagram intersection of doctors (to be, etc) and mothers (to be, etc)] are innately talented. But there are only 24 hours in a day. If 6 or 12 or 21 hours are spent outside the home, then we have that many fewer hours to accomplish what we want at home. We can become more efficient with patients, get all our work done during work hours, and become more efficient at home, organizing family life, but there is a physical limit to how much attention you can pay to the number of people and tasks around you. That is a sacrifice we make either as doctors or as mothers.

    With big families the dynamic is different. One woman can’t possibly take care of 20 kids but 5 teenagers can do pretty well with 15 younger kids. Your sisters are your other mothers.

    Ok! wish I could respond to everything awesome I read in the thread but that would be forever LOL. Asunshine you did have a really lovely perspective I remember.

    oh and about the Chinese New Year I went and took the hit to my attendance grade. I think attendance grades for lectures you could easily access asynchronously is ridiculous. That’s the kind of thing I mean about making it easier for us to balance this career with our families.

    In my ideal world all medical schools have online lectures that you can do from home, while breastfeeding. Or after your kids’ baseball game or whatever. I just feel like if more effort were made to accomodate families, the outcome would be happier, healthier, more productive doctors, as some of you alluded to. It seems that it’s going that way though. Slow going better than no going, and we’re the ones who will be doing it for our daughters to be able to grow up and do whatever they want with less guilt and less questioning of their abilities as professionals and/ or wives and mothers.

    Have a good day y’all! It’s Friiiiday 🙂

    #140592
    megboomegboo
    Participant

    Ooooh, norovorus. I had a visit late in January. Hate that houseguest. Hope you feel better.

Viewing 7 posts - 46 through 52 (of 52 total)
  • You must be logged in to reply to this topic.