May 3, 2003 at 8:27 am #82603MomMDParticipant
What do you do when you are stuck-in-a-rut? How do you find energy and courage for change? How do you enjoy what you have and live for today? Share any strategies, thoughts and tips for self-discovery, improvement, development or change!!
I know I need some! SethinaMay 4, 2003 at 1:32 pm #82604HannaParticipant
The very fact that most of us are “non-traditional” premeds tell us thst we have had some life experiences thst are beyond classical “go to school, finich up, start working as an MD, pay off loans, etc”.
Many of us, before embarking on this exciting part of our lives, got married, had children, and worked in some other profession.
To me, the most difficult part was just deciding on what to do with my life. I often wondered what is the right profession for me, is there is an easy way out of the routine day-to-day grind I found myself in?
Deciding to pursue medicine was one of the more grueling processes I rememeber, in my entire adult life. I felt I had to turn inward and search the deepest pores of my being, to see if I have necessary committment, reasons and endurance to live through the marathon called med school and med career.
I told my husband I need a few days of being alone, packed few necessities and went on my “quest for meaning”. When alone, person is allowed to be one’s true self, withou necessary facade we all have in our daily lives, when ewe try to balance mutiple roles life requires.
Some of the questions I posed for my self were in the form of argument with myself:
1) Hanna, you are 30 years old, this is too old for medical school. By the time you are done, you’ll be 40.
My response to myself: YOU WILL BE FORTY EVEN IF YOU NEVER TRY GOING TO THE MED SCHOOL.
2) My kids will be suffering, we shall not be together as much as I want to, guilty feelings, feeling inadequate as parent etc.
Answer: Ask yourself: Would you kids be happier knowing their mother is doing something she truly loves, and it shows in her everyday attitude
( and believe me, kids know !), or would they appreciate mother who is spending lots of time with them, but there is always that feeling that she sacrificed her ambitions in order to be a “good mother”. Remember, it has always been about QUALITY, never quantity of time spent with you kids/family/friends.
3) I am never going to make it through the program.
Answer: Everyhting in this world is created for people. People move mountains, if that is what they truly want, especially in the USA, where there are so many resources for people of all walks of life. Nothing is beyond me, I just need to know where to find help if I need it and I will make it through the program.
Finally, as my process of self-discovery unfolded, I reminded myself that sometimes it is good not to over-analyze things and dissect them into thousand pieces, all of which work against your making a decision.
Sometimes, you just have to plunge into things and trust your gut feeling.
I felt better after making this decision, thus ending 6 years of misery, goig from carreer counselor to career counselor, to psychologist, to my parents, spouse, friends and everyone who would list me lamenting about how unhappy I was.
Sometimes, in life, all it takes is COURAGE TO BE HAPPY.
By going through my prereqs and applying to med school, I know I am in charge of my happines and thst gives me tremendous feelings of self-efficacy, control and finally, my long-sought meaning in life.
Best of luck,
HannaMay 15, 2003 at 3:57 pm #82605Med4MomParticipant
When I was starting to feel in a rut career-wise, I decided to so some “personal strategic planning”. I had done strategic planning for several non-profit organizations as a consultant, and thought, why not apply the same principles to my own life and career path…? It was a very very useful tool in helping me narrow down my next career move.
Basically, strategic planning is a process in which you identify strengths and weaknesses in your business (or yourself in this case) and opportunities and threats within your environment. With all of that information, and several other tools, you develop a “roadmap” of sorts for getting to your identified goals. It is a great process to go through in terms of getting to know what motivates you and what things in your environment need to be addressed in order to move forward.
A search on Google under strategic planning should help you find a guideline for this process for businesses, and then you can just tailor it to your personal life.
:yes: mimiMay 21, 2003 at 7:04 am #82606psychParticipant
I pray and I have Monday lunches. When I set up my schedule, I saved Monday for me. Now I supervise a resident, go to Weight Watchers (which I am obviously going to need to do forever), and schedule lunch with a friend. This not only allows me to actually have friends (something I did not figure out how to do while having babies during residency) but it also lets me brainstorm with them. One of my friends is a personal coach, and she has been helpful and encouraging me as I make some choices about my life and practice.
Big news: I am getting my own office! I have been subletting someone’s space for 3 years, and I am now “moving on up” to my own space that I designed. I just spent (well, borrowed) a fortune on furniture that I love. I get to make the space personal and comfortable and professional. This has been a big shot in the arm for me and reinforces to me that I’m taking myself seriously for the long haul in this work.May 21, 2003 at 2:48 pm #82608drmoo55Participant
congrats psych!October 20, 2003 at 2:43 am #82609drmoo55Participant
what about an update on how you’ve settled into your new office
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